My Mother at Sixty-six
My Mother at Sixty-six -The Inevitable Passage of Time and the Fear of Loss
Driving from my parent’s
home to Cochin last Friday
morning, I saw my mother, beside me,
doze, open mouthed, her face
ashen like that
of a corpse and realised with
pain
that she was as old as she
looked but soon
put that thought away, and
looked out at Young
Trees sprinting, the merry children spilling
out of their homes, but after the airport’s
security check, standing a few yards
away, I looked again at her, wan,
pale
as a late winter’s moon and felt that
old
familiar ache, my childhood’s fear,
but all I said was, see you soon,
Amma,
all I did was smile and smile and
smile......
Kamala Das
Summary
The poem "My Mother at Sixty-six" by Kamala Das explores themes of aging, mortality, and the deep emotional bonds between mother and daughter. The speaker reflects on her mother's aging appearance, describing her as "ashen like that of a corpse" and "pale as a late winter’s moon." These vivid images convey the speaker's realization of her mother's mortality, evoking a sense of fear and sadness. Despite these feelings, the speaker smiles and expresses hope for a future meeting, highlighting the complex mix of emotions that come with recognizing the inevitability of aging and loss. The poem captures a moment of introspection and tenderness, showcasing Kamala Das's characteristic emotional depth and sensitivity in her poetry.
Critical Analysis of My Mother at Sixty-six by Kamala Das
Kamala Das's My Mother at Sixty-six is a deeply personal poem that captures the poignant emotions of a daughter grappling with her mother’s mortality. The poem, written in free verse, uses simple yet evocative language to convey the universal theme of aging and the inevitable separation between loved ones.
Theme of Mortality and Separation
The central theme revolves around the transient nature of life and the pain of impending separation. The poet’s mother is described as "ashen like that of a corpse," a simile that underscores the frailty and proximity of death. This realization evokes an emotional conflict within the poet—love and fear, acceptance and denial. Despite acknowledging her mother’s aging, she instinctively tries to distract herself by observing "Young Trees sprinting" and "merry children spilling out of their homes," symbols of vitality and continuity.
Imagery and Symbolism
Kamala Das masterfully uses contrasting imagery to juxtapose life and death. The "ashen face" and "wan, pale as a late winter’s moon" symbolize aging, frailty, and the inevitability of death, while "Young Trees sprinting" and "merry children" represent youth, energy, and the renewal of life. The late winter’s moon is a particularly apt metaphor—it is pale and dim, yet it carries a quiet beauty, much like the poet’s mother in her twilight years.
Tone and Emotional Resonance
The tone of the poem is deeply melancholic yet restrained. The poet does not wail or lament; instead, she conveys her grief with quiet dignity. The repetition of the word "smile" in the closing lines is ironic. The daughter’s smiles are an act of masking her deep-seated fears and pain, an attempt to reassure herself and her mother that everything will be fine.
Structure and Style
The poem is written in a single stanza, mirroring the uninterrupted flow of the poet’s thoughts. The use of enjambment creates a conversational tone, as though the poet is confiding her feelings to the reader. This free-flowing style makes the poem intensely personal and relatable.
Universal Appeal
While the poem is rooted in the poet’s personal experience, it resonates universally. Every child who has watched a parent age can relate to the "old familiar ache" of losing them, as well as the desperate attempts to hold on to hope and normalcy.
Conclusion
My Mother at Sixty-six is a beautifully crafted poem that captures the fragile and transient nature of life. Kamala Das’s evocative imagery, poignant tone, and universal theme make this poem a timeless reflection on love, aging, and the inevitability of loss. It reminds us to cherish our loved ones and the fleeting moments we share with them.
VIDEO PART ONE
List of poetic devices in My Mother at Sixty-six by Kamala Das.
1. Simile
"Her face ashen like that of a corpse": Compares the mother’s face to a lifeless body, emphasizing her fragility.
"Pale as a late winter’s moon": Compares the mother’s pale appearance to the dim moon, symbolizing aging and fragility.
2. Metaphor
"Young Trees sprinting": A metaphor for vitality and the energy of youth, contrasting with the mother’s stillness.
3. Personification
"Young Trees sprinting": The trees are personified to convey motion and life, highlighting the contrast with the aging mother.
4. Contrast
The poem contrasts images of life and youth (e.g., "Young Trees sprinting," "merry children spilling out of their homes") with aging and death (e.g., "ashen like that of a corpse," "wan, pale as a late winter’s moon").
5. Enjambment
Lines flow seamlessly without punctuation, reflecting the natural rhythm of thought and the poet’s emotional turmoil:
Example:
"doze, open mouthed, her face
ashen like that
of a corpse"
6. Imagery
"Her face ashen like that of a corpse": Creates a stark and haunting image of the mother’s aging.
"Young Trees sprinting, the merry children spilling out of their homes": Depicts the vibrancy of life outside.
"Late winter’s moon": Suggests dimness and fragility.
7. Alliteration
Repetition of consonant sounds for rhythm and emphasis:
"Smile and smile and smile": Repetition of "s" conveys the poet’s forced optimism.
8. Repetition (Palilogy)
"Smile and smile and smile": The repetition of "smile" emphasizes the poet’s effort to mask her pain and reassure herself and her mother.
9. Syndeton
Syndeton is a rhetorical device that uses a coordinating conjunction to join words, phrases, or clauses in a sentence:
"All I did was smile and smile and smile": The absence of conjunctions conveys the overwhelming emotion in a flowing, unbroken manner.
10. Symbolism
"Late winter’s moon": Symbolizes aging, the cycle of life, and diminishing vitality.
"Young Trees sprinting" and "merry children": Represent youth, vitality, and renewal.
11. Tone
Melancholic and reflective, with an undertone of irony (the smile masking deeper fears).
12. Irony
The poet smiles to hide her pain, but the repeated "smile and smile and smile" underscores the irony that the smile cannot erase her fears.
13. Free Verse
The poem does not follow a specific rhyme scheme or metrical pattern, reflecting the conversational and introspective nature of the poet’s thoughts.
14. Oxymoron
"Familiar ache": Combines opposing ideas—something being both familiar and painful—highlighting the inevitability and recurrence of the poet’s fear.
15. Emotional Appeal (Pathos)
The poem evokes empathy and sorrow as the poet reflects on her mother’s fragility and the looming separation.
Exercise: Cause and Effect Questions Based on My Mother at Sixty-six
Answer the following questions by identifying the cause and its effect from the poem.
1. Question: What caused the poet to feel pain as she observed her mother in the car?
Effect: The poet felt pain while looking at her mother’s frail and ashen face.
2. Question: Why did the poet compare her mother’s face to "a corpse"?
Effect: The comparison emphasizes the mother’s aging and her proximity to death.
3. Question: What made the poet look outside at the "Young Trees sprinting" and "merry children"?
Effect: The poet tried to distract herself from the painful realization of her mother’s aging.
4. Question: What caused the poet to feel "that old familiar ache"?
Effect: The poet was reminded of her childhood fear of losing her mother as she saw her pale and wan appearance.
5. Question: Why did the poet repeat the word "smile" in the closing lines?
Effect: The repetition reflects the poet’s effort to hide her sadness and reassure her mother while suppressing her inner fears.
Here’s the exercise presented in a tabular format:
Question | Cause | Effect |
What caused the poet to feel pain as she observed her mother in the car? | The poet saw her mother’s frail, ashen face. | The poet felt a deep emotional pain while observing her mother’s aging appearance. |
Why did the poet compare her mother’s face to "a corpse"? | The mother’s pale, lifeless expression due to aging. | The comparison highlights the mother’s fragility and her closeness to death. |
What made the poet look outside at the "Young Trees sprinting" and "merry children"? | The poet wanted to distract herself from her painful thoughts. | She shifted her focus to symbols of vitality and life outside the car. |
What caused the poet to feel "that old familiar ache"? | Seeing her mother pale and wan reminded her of her childhood fear. | The poet experienced a deep, familiar sadness about the possibility of losing her mother. |
Why did the poet repeat the word "smile" in the closing lines? | The poet wanted to mask her emotions and reassure her mother. | The repetition reflects her attempt to suppress her sadness and put on a brave front. |
This format makes it easier for students to identify and analyze the relationship between causes and effects in the poem.
Answer these questions
1. What is the kind of pain and ache that the poet feels?
2. Why are the young trees described as ‘sprinting’?
3. Why has the poet brought in the image of the merry children ‘spilling out of their homes’?
4. Why has the mother been compared to the ‘late winter’s moon’?
5. What do the parting words of the poet and her smile signify?
…………………………………………………………………………………….
Answers:
The poet's pain and ache are related to the realization of her mother's aging. When she sees her mother dozing in the car, she notices the signs of old age on her face, likening it to that of a corpse. This realization brings a sense of pain and ache, particularly the fear associated with the inevitability of aging and the passing of time.
The young trees are described as 'sprinting' to convey a sense of vitality and energy. This description contrasts with the image of the aging mother, emphasizing the cyclical nature of life. While the mother is growing older, the young trees represent the continuous cycle of life and the ongoing flow of time.
The image of the merry children 'spilling out of their homes' serves to highlight the vibrancy and liveliness of youth. It contrasts with the subdued image of the aging mother, further emphasizing the passage of time and the poet's awareness of the transient nature of life.
The mother's comparison to a 'late winter’s moon' suggests a sense of paleness and frailty. Late winter is a time when nature is often dormant, and the moon is associated with a cold and distant light. This comparison reinforces the poet's realization of her mother's frailty and the sense of approaching winter in her life.
The parting words of the poet, "see you soon, Amma," and her repeated smiles signify an attempt to hide or suppress her true emotions. Despite feeling the ache and fear associated with her mother's aging, the poet chooses to express optimism and reassurance. The smiles may serve as a coping mechanism or a way to comfort both herself and her mother in the face of the inevitable passage of time and separation.
Extra Questions:
How does the poet describe her mother's appearance as they drive to Cochin?
What realization does the poet have about her mother's age during the journey?
In what way does the poet try to push away the painful thought about her mother's age?
Why does the poet focus on the image of young trees "sprinting"?
What is the significance of the merry children "spilling out of their homes" in the poem?
Why does the poet use the metaphor of the mother being "pale as a late winter’s moon"?
What emotion does the poet convey when she says, "all I did was smile and smile and smile"?
How does the poet describe her childhood fear in the poem?
What role does the airport's security check play in the poet's perception of her mother?
What do the parting words, "see you soon, Amma," reveal about the poet's emotional state?
VIDEO PART TWO
Answers:
1. The poet describes her mother's appearance as dozing, open-mouthed, with her face ashen like that of a corpse.
2. The poet realizes that her mother is as old as she looks, which brings a sense of pain associated with the awareness of her mother's aging.
3. The poet pushes away the painful thought about her mother's age by looking out at young trees sprinting and observing the merry children spilling out of their homes.
4. The focus on the image of young trees "sprinting" conveys a sense of vitality and energy, contrasting with the poet's realization of her mother's aging and emphasizing the cyclical nature of life.
5. The merry children "spilling out of their homes" signify the vibrancy and liveliness of youth, providing a contrast to the subdued image of the aging mother. This highlights the transient nature of life.
6. The metaphor of the mother being "pale as a late winter’s moon" emphasizes her frailty and suggests a sense of coldness and distance, reinforcing the poet's realization of her mother's aging.
7. When the poet says, "all I did was smile and smile and smile," she conveys a complex emotion that could include an attempt to hide her true feelings, provide reassurance, or cope with the inevitable passage of time.
8. The poet describes her childhood fear as an "old familiar ache," suggesting that the fear of her mother aging is something she has felt since childhood.
9. The airport's security check serves as a moment of reflection for the poet, where she looks again at her mother and feels the ache associated with the realization of her mother's aging.
10. The parting words, "see you soon, Amma," and the repeated smiles suggest an attempt to express optimism and reassurance despite the underlying emotional turmoil about her mother's aging.